Category: The Balkans

Mid-term break and house-hunting…

Johnnyboy

The break is upon us and I have been using the time to work on my own schedule, look at possible rentals and, of course, stay a little bit more sober than yesterday.   All three have been going well and it is good to say that.  So far I have been working a lot in the darkroom and the digital lab but the apartment search has been most interesting.  For the most part it is much like anywhere with the same questions regarding power, water and so forth.  The difference is…well, no differences really except that it is not in Greece, I am sober and I doubt I’ll skip out on the rent in the middle of the night.  It has been 10 years since the last time I paid rent.  That amount varies from 200E to 550E a month and no one includes water or power and there are few if any wifi hook-ups.  We shall see.  Siga-siga, as they say in Greece–slowly, slowly.

The person with whom I had a huge blow-up last year is back this weekend for a short visit.  I have made a full amends to her and the two times I have seen her I have been cordial and polite if a little aloof.  I have forgiven her for what she said to me but that does not erase those words or how they ended our friendship.  I do not want her to be sad or hurt, but I am afraid she came here with expectations of being friends again.  That may be my own imaginings.  It would be ego-centric to believe any of this.  Still, my amends give me the ability to stay on the same side of the street with her and not have to avoid any kind of further meetings.  Tomorrow evening I’ll head to the regular Tuesday night AA meeting in Marpissa and talk about that if I need to.

All of this is not as important as I would like to make it out to be.  In the long run, these are small blips on the radar.  They point towards experiences from which I have garnered wisdom, like rocks in familiar seas I have learned to sail around.

I am also heading to Athens on Wednesday to pick up a camera I left for repair and see some friends.  I hope to hit at least one meeting while I am there, maybe two.

Johnnyboy

Barbarians at the gate and alcoholics in my midst…

Johnnyboy

There is a popular conception in Europe of Americans as barbarians.  We sit like slobs in our seats, legs outstretched, blocking the aisles, demanding out tickets (food, drink, etc…)in loud American English.  Sad to say this seems a truism.  I have been very aware of the Americans in my little ban this time and try as often as possible to not act like them.  The sad fact is that at their age I did act like them, and maybe worse.  Not all of the other student act this way, but many do.  They disregard notices on museum to abstain from photography and they sit, stand and loaf in the above mentioned manner.  Some of them have been revealed as hardcore wanna-be drinkers, going so far as to try to keep their boozing a secret by drinking when all the others have gone to bed.  It is easy for me to pinpoint the real alcoholics from the potentials because the real deal do not need the alcohol to act like it.  Their ego-driven self will is out there for all to see and a lack of alcohol just makes it more obvious.  When drinking they can almost blend into the crowd.

There is nothing I can do except stay out of their way.  The can bulldoze all they want through this term and I am keeping myself clear of their chaos, and there will be chaos, especially when we reach the island.  I doubt these kids will get much work done.  That being said I am the once who needs to get my work done, be selfish with my time and resources.  I can also set a few ground rules with them regarding the dark room and what that means.  There is only one I need to talk to and all he needs to know that there is no place for drunkenness or goofing off in the dark room with his buddies after a long night drinking.  This can be said with candor, honesty and, I hope, a sense of man-to-man straightforwardness.

Regarding my own program of action:  I will be attending the Tuesday night meetings on the island and, possibly, the Monday night group as well.  The second group is Greek-speaking, but it is easy enough to have translator for the bi-lingual angle.  This, on top of my mp3 speakers, phone calls and Skyping once on a while can keep me sober, sane, happy, joyous and free.

I will be in Rome tomorrow and I have the addresses for the meetings there.  They are a short, but uphill, walk from the hotel.  I will be grateful to be able to hit two–Monday and Tuesday evening.

Regarding the behavior of others…What I learned from last year is a gift from the Al-Anon program:  I didn’t cause it, can’t cure it and can’t control it.  What a relief that is!  Once again this is  a one-day-at-a-time formula for living that insures my own emotional sobriety.

More will be revealed…Johnnyboy